.. 'I meant my dress size, you f****ing idiot!!!'The moral of this story: Even when a man is listening, he's still gonna get it wrongThese are complim...nts of MikeyHOSPITAL CHART BLOOPERSActual excerpts from hospital charts(Parenthetical thoughts are mine.)1. The patient refused autopsy. (Wouldn't you?)2. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital. (Could be a problem.)3. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year. (Really! Someone roll her over.)4. On the. A few minutes after ten, Doug heard the buzzer signaling that the front door had opened. Walking out to the front of the office he could see Lisa standing and shaking hands with Jeff and then with a lady that Doug assumed was Jeff’s wife Amy. Doug walked up and also engaged in the introductions and the handshakes.“I like the office as it looks very professional,” said Jeff.“Lisa deserves all the credit for doing that. All I did was give her a credit card” said Doug, which caused the three of. ” I said. “I want to hear you use whatever language you use in your imagination when you are fingering yourself and thinking about your boyfriend.”She obviously liked this sort of talk and started to treat it like a game. She leaned forward and pressed her small breasts against my chest. Between little kisses along my neck she whispered in my ear.“Tell me where you want to put your cock Jay.”“Inside you Candy.”“Where inside me?”“I want to slip it into your sweet little cunt Candy.”“Mmmm.” she. She ran her hands up and down his back. “Darling,” he said. “Oh, love.” He stroked in and out of her as he held her breasts. She clutched his moving legs with her thighs and rested her feet on his calves.She spiraled upwards in time to his strokes. When she spasmed around him, he said “Darling,” again. Then, just as she was finishing, David thrust into her harder than before. “Oh, Jen Ni Fer,” he said as he throbbed deep inside her.For a moment, he was a single rigid shape, his muscles feeling.
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