I have so many questions that will have to remain unanswered. This loss, the slow grind of acceptance, is terrible. You fill my thoughts and my heart...hurts. I wish for a different outcome. Crazy thoughts shoot through my head, bouncing off memories of you. What if I’d called sooner? I should have sent more little positive messages. I should have just asked permission to visit. If I had, you’d still be here, fighting. Then I wouldn’t have this huge ache inside. I recognize these thoughts as. He explained people needed a focus for their condolences. They treated me like I was his widow. Sometimes it was embarrassing to imagine what they must have thought but everyone was polite. Rhonda stopped and held my hand for a long moment while tears streamed down her cheeks. Eventually, she pointed at the picture she’d painted and just mouthed, “Thank you,” and then left.Another blonde in black stood before me. I was a little in awe. Cali Marx had come to Dag’s funeral.“You must be Deb. I was disappointed, but I knew that chances were really good that he'd be back. He, like me, had come here for a reason. I also knew that black dudes - ANY men, really - who came to these arcades, were either there to get sucked off or to suck someone else off.I went into a booth and put a coupon in the slot. The video came on and I sat on the bench and took out my dick. I heard his steps approaching. Then he was standing the open door, looking in at me. I looked up. He was holding his hand,. I heard the front door open and a voice call out "We're here." Tyrone hollered back for them to come on up, "And hurry. We need some help." Derek and four other guys came into the bedroom and immediately started to strip.I glance over at them and said, "Tyrone is almost ready to shoot and when he gets out of the way I need one of you to get right on so we can keep her going."Here it comes honey," Ty said and a moment later he pulled away from Helen and Devon rolled her over and pushed into her.
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He could not stand her out of his sight, not even at a party together. She lived with it so long that it seemed normal to her. She was striking in her
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